No to hoarding.

One of the realizations of old age is that there is so much wastage in one’s younger years. Do you agree with that? I am in my 40’s now. And I may not be old old yet, but when I look back to my 20’s and 30’s, yes, there was so much I could have saved. There was so much waste, literally and figuratively.

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I remember watching this reality show where people hoard different items to the point that their homes and lives are being destroyed by the items they cannot dispose of. One lady hoarded tons of books. She literally made a bed out of the books inside her house. It was a mess! The intervention team brought a rent a bin for junk removal to help her clean her home so they could give her back a semblance of life she once had. The lady refused to part with her books in the beginning. But when the intervention team pointed out that rats were living alongside her on those books, she reluctantly agreed.

After watching that show, I looked at my boxes and boxes of books and stuff realizing that I have wasted so much money hoarding books that looked really beautiful but I had no intention of reading. Book covers used to attract my attention a lot. So, even when I didn’t like the story, I’d still buy the book so I could display it. I also did this to notebooks and notepads and any kind of paper for that matter. My sister used to call me a hoarder because I was one. But that show opened my eyes to the waste around me. I sorted my books, separated the ones I haven’t read yet that I wasn’t too keen on reading, those books I already read that I didn’t want to keep anymore, and sold all of those books. I kept three boxes of books that I truly liked and wanted to read sometime in the future.

These days, I think a million times before I buy something. Not only books but also other personal stuff. I will add it to cart (because I now mostly buy my stuff online) but I’d keep the items there. After a few days, realization will come and I’d either check the items out or I’d empty my cart. A few years of life gave me a percentage of wisdom I need.

I used to dream of filling my room with books. Shelves and shelves of books that I could show off to my family, friends, and acquaintances. I visualize their eyes going wide with my bedroom looking like a library. It was a dream of mine. Not anymore, though. These days, a clean, clutter-free room is what I like to maintain. I use a Kindle e-book reader nowadays. Cheaper and space saver. Also, more environment-friendly.

I still dream of a house with a big library with all my favorite books displayed beautifully on it. It will remain a dream for me because I will not return to hoarding paper stuff anymore. Or any other item for that matter.

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To sell or to keep?

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Our family has a Ford Everest SUV for about five years now. It was a car loan and it took a couple of years to finish paying for it. It was my Dad’s car and he took care of it like a father to a child. Carwash, full tank, annual change oil. Registered on time and the insurance renewed annually as well. Even called someone for dash cam installation when it was fairly new.

My Dad passed away last year, March 10 to be exact. It was a blow to all of us because he truly was the head of the family and he took care of almost everything for all of us. We realized how dependent we were on him when he was taken away so suddenly. He would drive me to work, drive my nephew and younger sister to their respective schools, drive us almost anywhere we needed to go to. And, then, gone.

So, it’s been close to a year now that the SUV has been sitting in our garage. My brother drove it a couple of times but that’s it. We would start the engine, just to keep it going, but it’s parked in the garage, not moving.

I have been contemplating on selling our Ford Everest SUV. For one, no one wants to drive it. I can get a driver’s license and go to driving school. But, truth is, I would love a smaller car. Slightly smaller than the Everest, probably a little like a Ford Ecosport. Even my Dad knew that. Also, until I can still get a great price for it. Newer models have come out so buyers might want a secondhand car of a newer model than the one we have. On the other hand, we have the older model which was sturdier according to some professional drivers I talked to. Our SUV model is still a better choice than the newer ones. Someone even asked how much I would be selling the car but I haven’t really decided yet.

The sentimental value is overpowering my practical mind. It was my Dad’s car. He took care of it like a child of his own. He loved it. The practical side of me is pushing me to sell it not that it still has a higher resale price. Also, it is still in a very much good condition. Who would want to buy it when it is already old and in need of fixing?

Do I sell it or keep it?

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Being a BTS Army

BTS, Dynamite

I remember cringing the very first time I watched their music video of Boy With Luv featuring Halsey. Grown boys wearing make-up, sporting bubble gum-colored hairs, with pastel-colored get-ups… and even wearing flower-shaped rings on their fingers!

But then I watched them, really watched them perform. My, oh, my! Superb dancers! You can see that they worked so hard for every music that they released. After Boy With Luv, I immediately got hooked on Dynamite, Mic Drop, Idol, DNA, Fire, and more!

The seven-member South Korean pop group known as BTS or Bangtan Sonyeondan or Bangtan Boys has become a favorite of mine now.

Yes, I am now an Army!

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